The Most Dangerous Phrase
Okay that was more like the opening line of a cheesy novel or the subject of some terrible social media click bait, but we’re not kidding. There’s a phrase that gets thrown around that should send shivers up your spine – we do it, you likely do it, Joan and Jeff in accounts will do it too. The phrase itself isn’t the scary part, it’s the context in which its used that can be dangerous.
What is this bada$$ phrase?
“I know …”
Consider this … you’re at work, something has happened to make you ask a few questions of your colleagues to understand things a little better, such as “What’s the outcome we’re looking for here” or “how do we know we should do this?” and you’re met with “I know we’re doing the right thing” or “I know why we’re doing this and we just need to get on with it”
Or maybe you’ve heard from …
Sales people “I know what the customer wants …”
Marketing people “I know our target market want …”
Operations people “I know the best way …”
Finance people “I know what the final number needs to be …”
Developers “I know what the functionality needs to be …”
We think its the equivalent of the old parental ‘because I said so’ – it assumes a position of authority, shuts down discussion, and rules out other possibility. It also may not be right!
If you’re mid-discussion and suggesting some ideas or information that might be worth considering and you’re working with someone who responds with “I know ….” then shutting down and leaving the conversation there may be what they want, they may be assuming a lot, they may also be hiding that they don’t actually know and worried they’ll be ‘caught out’ even when it’s safe or okay to not have all the answers. Be okay with asking a few more questions. Responding with “I’d like to discuss this a little more before we close this out. Can you talk me through what insights you’ve got?” can be a good approach.
In sales, assumptions help us move from one scenario to the next with an expectation of what to prepare for. Having an idea or concept in mind is helpful but sales people can often assume they know exactly what their customers want which is dangerous. Miller Heiman, in their Strategic Selling training, have a hard rule about documenting customer needs – you can only write down what your customers actually tell you they need. Their words, not what you think they need. That approach is worth applying in all your customer engagements – ask them, listen, absorb then decide the course of action.
It’s great to trust your colleagues and to be trusted when you do have the knowledge, but don’t always rely on “knowing” - there’s power in asking “How do you know”.
“The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge.”
